Dear, Jacob
by iLoveYouStar
Summary: AH.AU.Jacob&Leah are a newly wedd couple in Russia during WWII, Jacob is sent to war, leaving Leah with their small son.Leah never thought she loved Jacob,but is it possible to fall in love with your husband through letters? The only way of communication
1. Daylight

**My life was never perfect, but it wasn't the worse.**

**It was normal, as normal was a life in the Russian countryside could get.**

**I lived on a large farm with my parents and young brother.**

**Farming, cleaning, sewing, typical life.**

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* * *

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**Chapter One;**

"Leah! Leah, hold up," I heard Emily yell from behind me.

I smiled, ignoring her small protests, Emily was my second cousin. Her father, my dad's brother lived just up the long road.

She often came to see me, seeing she was an only child.

She caught up with me, slapping my shoulder laughing.

"Hey! Quit it," I laughed, hitting her lightly with the milk bucket.

"Where are you going?" She asked.

"I'm going to get some milk," I said, pointing to the barn where the

cows where.

"What's the occasion?" She asked, getting a cherry from her apron pocket.

"The Blacks are coming over in a few days, might as well start on the food," I said.

She nodded.

"Those brothers eat and I mean _eat_," she laughed.

I laughed, leaning on her.

"Em," I said.

"What?"

"I love you."

"Mhm, me too."

I laughed, pushing her.

She laughed, shaking her head.

"I can finally french braid my hair to my waist," I said, carefully letting my hair cascade down my back.

"It's getting long. Almost like mine," Emily smiled.

We finally reached the barn, I pushed the old doors apart, seeing the old brown cow my father called "Muds" waiting.

"Hey, Muds," I said, putting my hair back up.

"This cow is getting big, I'm suprised Uncle Harry hasn't sold it," Emily said.

"My father sells everything, I'm suprised I'm still here. I think The Blacks are going to buy it," I said, patting the cow's side.

"The Blacks are big buyers, I heard Sarah and Billy are already starting to look for a wife for Jacob," she said, pulling two small stools up.

I sat down, beginning the milking.

"Jacob, he's the oldest?" I asked.

"Yeah, Paul's like just a little younger," Emily said, looking at the sheep sleeping.

"I haven't seen them in so long," I said, focusing on the cow.

"Yeah, me too. I mean last time I saw them was when Jacob's sister, Rachel fled to Poland."

"Yeah, I remember that. Her parents were very upset."

"Still are, she was suppose to marry Anton Geerk."

"Yeah, but well you saw what happened."

"Yup," Emily said, I turned and smiled at her.

"What?"

"How's you know?"

"Who?"

"You know.."

"Oh! Sam, he's good."

"Mm, still with him?"

"Sometimes, he's gone to Moscow, lookin' for work."

"Oh, Ma was saying Uncle Luke, he was starting to look at the boys in town," I said, looking at Emily.

"Pa, he knows I don't want to get married, I'm to young!"

"Emily! You're 24!"

"I'm not marrying anyone."

"Whatever," I said, looking at the milk bucket.

* * *

Emily and I started hauling the bucket together, spilling some.

We laughed, wobbling all the way towards my house.

"Ma! Open the door," I yelled.

I heard soft footsteps approuching, then the screen door was opened.

"Leah, stop wobbling!" Ma said, taking the bucket.

She sat it on the table, offerring Emily and I fresh bread.

"Aunt Sue, thank you," Emily smiled.

"I'm not suprised to see you here," Ma laughed.

"I got lonley, Ma and Pa went out," she said, starting to nibble her bread.

"Where's Pa and Seth?" I asked.

"Went to get some fire wood," Ma said, looking outside.

It was late afternoon, the sun was still out.

Short summer was ending, long winter was coming.

"Aunt Sue, I heard The Blacks are coming?" Emily asked.

"Yes, later."

"I haven't seen them since Rachel fled to Poland," Emily said, looking at what was left of her bread.

"I rather you girls not mention that when they came," Ma said, chopping some carrots.

I heard footsteps then Seth and my father came in, carrying wood.

"Pa!" I smiled, opening the door.

"Leah, where've been all morning?" He asked.

"Getting milk," I said.

"Emily's here? Well she's always here, Ma we got the wood, good thing to 'cause September's stating to end, getting chilly," Seth said, taking a bread from the table.

"Hey!" Emily laughed.

"Awe, Em. You know we love having you over her, it's starting to get late, best be heading home. Tell Luke and Anne we expect you guys over in a few days," Pa told Emily.

"Will do, Uncle Harry," she smiled, heading outside.

"I love Emily," Ma said, getting Seth and Pa some late lunch.

"We stopped by town, war's getting nasty," Pa said.

"Germany still?" Ma asked.

"Yup, their taking the small countries, they took Poland not long ago," Pa said, looking at his hands.

"Poland?" I said.

"Yeah, Billy must be havin' it hard with Rachel there," Ma said, shaking her head.

"Those Germans need to be taught a lesson, they can't just go around like that," Seth said, rolling his sleeves up.

"It ain't just them, Japanese too," Pa said.

"Oh, good lord," Ma said, rolling her eyes.

"We best just pray nothing bad happens," I told Ma.

Ma nodded.

* * *

The next days were spent preparing for The Blacks visit, we cleaned the two spare rooms, and started making a feast.

The war was still going on, Germany was still in power, no one else.

We killed a fresh pig, made pies and cakes, made everything possible.

Aunt Anne , Uncle Luke and Emily came over the evening they were suppose to arrive. So there we waited beside the house in our fresh fur coats, waiting.

Pa and Uncle Luke were still talking about the war, how things were going good for Italy and Germany.

I saw them coming, I could see them.

"I see them!" Emily smiled.

"Yeah, me too," I said, looking at their new car.

Cars were out, but we lived in the good country side.

"Ah! Billy, Sarah, Paul, Jacob!" Uncle Luke and Pa smiled.

"Hello," Billy and Sarah smiled.

I looked over at Jacob, he looked so different.

He was taller, leaner, more built, he was darker probably from working their land. He looked so better, so better.

He caught me, so I smiled.

Paul and Jacob both walked over, smiling.

"My, my. Look at the dwarfs they sure have grown," Paul smiled.

"It's been a long time," I smiled, looking at them.

"Yeah, I know," Jacob smiled.

His voice was different.

We went inside for some dinner, taking.

No one mentioned the war, or Germany's invation on Poland.

No Rachel.

None.

After a long dinner, Emily and her parents started to head home.

"Leah," my father said, looking at me.

"Y-yes?" I asked.

"You should show Jacob around, take a lantern," Pa said, looking at Jacob.

I nodded, getting my coat and lantern.

Jacob got his coat, heading outside with me.

We were hit with the fresh breeze, fresh night.

"What part do you want to see first?" I asked.

"Whatever, part," he said, looking around.

I started to lead him towards the farm, watching the farm grow closer and closer.

"Leah!" Jacob yelled, grabbing my waiste from behind.

"Jacob! Please," I said, shaking him off.

I could hear his roar of laughter.

I shook my head, opening the barn doors.

"My father is going to buy that cow," he stated.

"Nice," I said.

"It's been so long," he stated.

"Yeah, I know," I said.

"Last time I came you were, what 14?" He said.

"I'm 20 now," I stated.

"Time is going by pretty fast," he said.

"Yeah, I know."

"I mean with the war, and Rach's home getting attacked.."

"What?"

"Yeah, we got a letter, it said she was removed from her home, takin' somewhere. But she wanted to live in Poland," he said, shaking his head in anger.

I nodded.

"Pa, he didn't want to talk about it. He said it brought an embarrasment to the family, the way she just left," he hissed.

"She did it for love," I stated.

He hughed, shaking his head.

"Love," he spat.

I saw on one of the long bars, resting on my arms.

"Hey, I wanna show you something," he said, pulling me off the bar.

"What could that possibly be?" I asked, raising my eyebrow.

"The _American _way of dancing," he said with an accent, wrapping his arms around my waiste.

"I've never danced like this?" I laughed.

"It's easy, Lee. Here, your arms go around my neck," he said, smiling.

He started moving us, with a light rhythem.

"This is actually pretty fun," I smiled.

"I know," he smiled.

"Where did you learn this?" I asked.

"I saw it in the newspaper, a photo," he said.

"It must be nice," I stated.

"What?"

"Reading and writing."

"It's alright, it helps alot. Who knows, maybe one day I'll show you," he laughed.

I laughed, letting go of his neck.

"When are you guys leaving?" I asked.

"Tomorrow afternoon," he stated.

"Really? Another four to six years until we see each other again," I smiled.

"You'll probably be married, have a bunch of children," he laughed.

"Yes, of course," I said, sarcasm heavy in my voice.

"Oh, c'mon Leah. Another few months and you'll father will already find you a husband, I can almost promise it," he said.

"Maybe not, Emily is older than me and her father has no intention of marriege for her," I pointed out.

"Yes, but it's because Emily is their only child, your parents have Seth," he said.

"Ugh, I rather not think about that," I said.

"Soon you will have too," he said, walking out of the barn.

I sighed, following him.

I clutched the lantern in one hand, while following at a slow pace.

"You know, Leah. My family actually came for something else," he said, stopping to wait for me.

"Mm, I can hardly imagine," I said, catching up to him.

"My father wants me to already marry, he's scared I'll run like Rachel, that I won't give him what he wants; grandchildren," Jacob said.

"Um, that's nice?"

"Leah, he asked me if I was interested in any girls, and sadly you were the only one that came to mind," he said, looking at me.

"You came all the way from your home, just to- oh, my gosh. Jacob! You know how stupid this sounds?" I smiled.

"C'mon, Lee. I can make you happy, you know I can. I can work, I'll built us a house, we'll get married, we'll have babies," he said, hope deep in his eyes.

"This isn't a very easy choice, it's a life changing one," I pointed out.

"Lee, you have until tomorrow. Please, Leah," he said, looking at me again.

Marry Jacob?

Was this boy serious?

"Marriege is a big word," I told him.

"You'd be happy," he whined.

"Would I? And for the record , Jacob. Worst. Marriege. Proposal. Ever," I laughed.

"Lee, you're so hard to please," he whined.

"Really? Are you ready for many ,many ,many years of that?" I challeneged.

"Tomorrow I want my answer," he said, going inside.

Tomorrow.

It would be better to marry Jacob, than a totaly stranger.

He was sweet, a hardworker, someone my family would _love_.

Love.

I didn't love Jacob.

I loved the idea of love, though. I loved how Emily decribed it.

I wanted love.

Could he give me love?

It was better Jacob than anyone else.

* * *

I got up the next morning like every morning, I went to feed the animals, but this time someone joined me.

Jacob walked beside me in silence, his hands shoved in his pockets.

"I want my answer," he stated.

"Okay, I've thought about this, ALOT. I guess in the end, you are the best choice," I stated.

"Oh, thank god," he said.

"Why?"

"Because, my father already talked to yours about it," he said, nodding.

"Jacob Black," I said, shoving the empty basket of food at him.

"Leah, I'm sorry," he said, looking up.

"It doesn't matter, life is life," I said, looking up at him.

"So how is this gonna work out?" I asked him.

"Well today our parents will talk about it, then the wedding will be planned, but during that our house will be starting to get built," he said.

"Where is it exactly going to be located?"

"Between both our parents' homes. We can't just live close to one," he said.

"Oh, I see."

"You should be happy, Leah!"

"Happy?"

"Yeah, we're getting married," he smiled.

* * *

"You're. Getting . Married," Emily glared.

"I'm afraid so," I told Emily.

Jacob had left yesterday, everything had been arranged.

Now we would just wait.

"Leah, but why?"

"Because, he can offer me such a great future."

"Really? What about getting married for love! Leah, you out of all people!"

"I'm sorry, Emily."

She stomped, glared, and just completly lost it.

Ma was different, she was really happy.

She talked about it all day, how we should live, our children's names, everything.

* * *

The weeks went by fast, the wedding was here before I knew it.

The religious part was long, it was something speciel.

When I became Leah Black.

The same forever.

"Jacob, I swear. If I trip I'll kill you," I told Jacob, who's hand was over my eyes.

"Ha, c'mon, we're almost there," he said.

He took his hand off, reveling our new home.

It was small, but it was so _us. _

We had neighbors, something I had always wanted.

He opened the door, the house seemed big, but maybe because it was that it lacked furniture.

"I like it," I smiled.

"Yeah?" He smiled.

I nodded.

"C'mon, you'll like our room," he smiles, leading us down the small hallway.

He opened the small door, it led to a small room, it was so comfy looking.

"Yeah, I like it too," I smiled.

"I'm glad you like it, I didn't really know what you liked," he smiled, turning me around.

He kissed me.

I kissed back.

It was a honeymoon after all...

* * *

"Left, right, Jacob," I laughed, rolling my eyes.

"Lee, I just worked all day long, I can't feel a thing," he said, patting my stomach.

I laughed.

"In a few months, I know I'll be able to feel it," he chuckled.

"It'll be born when it starts to get warm, I'm happy for that," I smiled.

"Mhmm," he said, closing his eyes.

The first months of pregnancy flew by.

Life went easy.

Jacob had a good job, he supported us.

Our families were happy.

As for Emily, her Sam never came back.

No one has ever heard of him again.

Emily is broken, but she has to move on.

The war is getting worse, much worse.

America refuses to help in the war.

Japan is growing.

Germany is growing.

Emily has come to see me for a few days, she's depressed.

"So have you thought of any names?" She asks.

"No," I say.

"Why?"

"Jacob is choosing it, he already has them chosen. It'll be a suprise."

"Leah, are you happy?"

"Yeah, I am."

"Really?"

"Yeah."

Is it really that hard to believe?

It makes me wonder why Sam hasn't come back.


	2. My Sunshine

Okay, so look this is only the beginning of WWII, so Russia hasn't entered the war. My characters are only concerned because Rachel was in Poland. I don't know much about Russia's weddings going on that time, or the farm situation. I'm sorry if you don't like that part, truely. I'm really sorry but I'm gonna twist up the war a littlee.. Thanks for the reviews(:!

R&R!

**

* * *

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**Seasons come and go, sometimes they change life, sometimes they don't.**

It's what my parents use to say to me , alot. Today Emily and I are going on a week trip to a city, we're going furniture shopping.

We're leaving for a week, staying with Jared, Emily's cousin. His wife Kim said it was okay, and I really want to see how she handles Paul, their small toddler.

After a long three day trip, we arrive. It looks better, Pa remembers the revolution, he said it was nasty, and just horrible.

I place a hand on my stomach, even through the layers of

clothing, I feel my small child.

Winter is very harsh here in Russia, especielly for newborns, I'm glad my baby will be born when it begins to get warmer.

Emily looks over at me, her eyebrows crumpled.

"What are you thinking about?" She asks.

"Jacob, I miss him," I said.

It's not a total lie, I do miss him, I've never been more than a day away from him since we're been married.

She rolls her little hazel eyes, "It's a week."

I nodd, looking at the driver; Jared.

"Jared, tell me what is Kim like?" I ask.

"Quiet, you'll like her, don't worry we're almost there," he smiles.

I smile.

After a few more hours, we arrive.

Their home is small, the city is nice, it's calm.

Jared opens the door; it shows a small woman, she has a small boy in her arms.

The small boy mirrors Jared in every way, even his smile.

"Kim, this is my cousin Emily and her cousin Leah," Jared smiles, he wraps his arms around his small family.

"Paa-," Julian coos, reaching for Jared.

Jared smiles, taking his small son into his large arm.

His other arm is around his wife.

"It's very nice to meet you, Leah when are you due?" Kim asks in her quiet small voice.

"Late June, it's late January, so we'll see," I say.

We're having warm milk with fresh bread after Jared takes Paul out for some errands.

"Kim-, I know I keep bugging you, but Sam," Emily pleas.

"You want the truth? It's very bad," she says quietly.

"Yes, it's what I have wanted!" She says, putting her milk down.

"Fine, but I warned you," Kim says, putting her cup down.

"Sam has a brother, his name was Spencer. Spencer, he fled to Germany in May. You've seen how bad the war is getting! Sam, he got a letter from his brother, explaining that he was going to return to home because Germany was getting bad, very bad.

Spencer was suppose to return in August but he never did. Germany's new leader, Adolf Hitler he is seperating Germany, by race. He thinks that blonde, blue eyed people are the ideal race, all the others like of other religions are not wanted. Spencer, he looks nothing like a blonde!

I'm afraid Sam went to China to join the army to fight Germany."

Emily looked on the verge of tears; her mouth wide open.

I looked down at the bread in my hands, biting my lower lip.

"H-h-h-he-e f-f-led t-t-t-to Ch-ch-i-n-na-a j-j-just t-t-o j-oi-n-n th-th-e Ar-r-r-my!" Emily demanded through tears.

Kim said nothing, just nodded lightly.

Emily broke down in tears, her sobs the only thing that filled the small home.

I looked at my wedding finger, thinking about Jacob.

I tried not to think about Emily, I tried to think of something else; anything.

Her sobs lasted for at least 45 minutes.

She excused herself to the guest room, leaving us in heavy silence.

"Is-is it hard having a little one around?" I asked Kim, breaking the awkwardness.

"At first, then you get use to it," she smiled.

"Are you guys planning any more children?" I asked.

"Maybe, I would like a little girl, but for the moment, no," she smiled.

I smiled back.

"What names do you like?" She asked.

"Jacob's picking the name, but if we have anymore children I like the names Alena and Anton," I smiled.

"I want to name our possible daughter Samantha, like Sam he was Jared's best friend," she says.

We should name our possible son, Samuel.

It would mean so much to Emily.

"Where would you like to go tomorrow?" She asks.

"Just look around, we only have one day," I smile.

She smiles back.

Jared and Julian return a few minutes later, Julian falls asleep in seconds.

I rock him while his parents have dinner together, having their alone time.

Julian is over two, but he's small for his age.

He lays across my swollen belly, his little face peaceful.

It's hard to imagine that in a few months, it'll be me doing this everyday.

The radio is soft, classic music.

* * *

The next day we hit the town, seeing what it has to offer.

There isn't much, just normal city people.

We walk around all day, I buy nothing but blue and pink fabric.

We leave for our home the next morning, we say our goodbyes to Julian and Kim, she promises to visit when the baby is born.

Emily is silent the whole way home, her eyes look pained, she looks broken.

She looks different, her eyes no longer show the young woman who loves life.

They show pain, they show nothing.

After the long trip, we pull up to Emily's farm first.

Her parents question us, and Jared tells them why.

They say nothing, yet their faces show pity for their only daughter.

Finally Jared pulls up to my house.

Jacob is barely getting home, he opens the door, pulling me into a warm hug.

He gets my bag from Jared, thanking him for returning me safe.

"Lee, I missed you so much. I suck at cooking, I can barely heat up the bread and meat you left me," he says, sitting down at the table.

He has the fire turned on,so I take my heavy thick coat off.

"Hi, baby," he smiles, getting up to feel my belly.

"Jacob, I was thinking," I say.

"About?"

"The baby's name."

"Yeah?"

"I wanna name him Samuel."

"What if he is a she?"

"Well, what do you like?"

"I want Anna Regina," he says, kissing my lips lightly.

"We'll see," I smile.

He smiles back and I know I'm home.

Even if we have never said "I love you" to each other.

We still care about each other, still want to be together.

"I made the crib," he smiles, leading me to our small room.

"Really?" I smile.

It's a light wood crib, more like a craddle. The head board is a big pattern, it's big enough for three babies.

"It's so pretty," I say, tracing the pattern with my fingers.

"Seth and I worked hard on it," he smiled.

Awe, my baby brother.

I smile.

* * *

It's late summer, the window's are open. June.

I feel sticky.

I wake up in bed, Jacob is beside me hugging his other pillow.

Did I pee?

No,ew. Please no.

It's not blood, not pee, it's like _water._

Oh, gosh.

I think it's time.

I shake Jacob.

"Jacob, Jacob," I say, shaking him lightly.

"Mhhhh," he groans.

"Jacob!" I yell.

He shoots up, rubbing his eyes.

"What's wrong?" He asks, turning a lantern on.

"I'm going into labour, my contractions just broke my water. C'mon, we have to get to my ma, we still have a few hours," I tell him, getting up.

He gets up, packing some stuff, some of our baby's stuff.

I change, making me way to the car.

It doesn't feel like labour, it feels like someone is lightly pushing on my pelvis, then squeezes it.

"Do you need help?" Jacob asks me.

"No, I don't feel anything yet," I tell him.

Jacob has bought a car, it's used but it's still good.

We start out towards my parents' home, we send someone to get Jacob's parents.

"Leah!" Ma asks, rubbing her eyes.

"My water broke, I think the baby will be here in the late morning," I say.

Jacob and I stay in my old room, resting against each other.

"I can't wait," he smiles.

"Me either," I smile.

We wait.

Paul, Sarah, Billy, Ma, Pa, Seth, Emily and her parents are here. Waiting.

Waiting.

My contractions are slow.

Slow.

Jacob takes me to walk around the farm to speed things up, it's rarely warm.

* * *

June 22, 1940.

We walk all morning, nothing.

Then in the afternoon, things get painful.

It feels like someone is ripping me in half, pulling.

Sarah and Ma are the only ones in the room.

"M-ma! I-i w-want J-jacob!" I yell.

Their coming close, really close.

Ma looks mad, like some wants to be the one in the room.

Then Jacob comes in, he sits down by my side, holds my hand, kisses my cheek.

"C'mon, Leah! You can do it, just push," he tells me, gripping my hand tightly.

"C'mon, I see the baby!" Sarah tells me, standing between my legs.

Shyness is the last thing on my mind at this point.

After what seems of hours of pain; I feel something _really _rip through me.

"Ahh!" I scream, Jacob tightens his grip again.

Ma stands by, waiting.

I feel something just swush out, it feels like relief.

"Auhhh! Waauhh!" Someone cries for the first time.

I close my eyes, exhausted.

"It-it's Samuel," Jacob smiles, kissing me over and over again.

I smile weakly, ignoring the thick layers of sweat on my face.

"Leah?" Ma smiles, offering me the boy wrapped in a stained blanket.

"J-jacob, you go, I feel really tired," I say, I feel like my energy has been drained.

"He's perfect, Lee," Jacob smiles at me.

I feel weak, so when I feel light headed, I go black.

After an hour of sleep I wake up.

"Lee?" It's Jacob, he's holding the baby.

I sit up, popping a few muscles.

"Let me see," I smile.

He gentley places Samuel in my arms, letting me get comfortable.

He's small, he looks like Seth and Jacob.

His eyes are dark brown, and huge.

His head is full of thick black hair.

"Awe, Samuel," I coo, kissing his little face.

"He's so little," Jacob tells me, getting Samuel's little hand.

"Very, has everyone met him yet?" I ask.

"Yeah, everyone," he says.

I hold him near me, caressing his little face.

We stay the first week at Ma's, but honestly I can hardly wait to leave.

She likes to take care of Samuel on her own, letting me do nothing.

"Ma," I say annoyed.

She's rocking Samuel, like it's her baby.

"Ma! I got this, okay? I understand," I say, trying to stay calm.

Samuel's my baby, I need to learn how to care for him on my own.

* * *

Samuel's first months past by fast, pretty fast.

"Momma loves Samuel," I coo at the little boy I have wrapped in a thin blanket.

His eyebrows crumple, he looks towards the cows.

We're at my parents' farm.

I'm scared, this will be his first Russian winter.

He might get sick.

He might not make it.

Jacob comes from fixing the barn's roof with Seth.

"Samuel!" Seth's husky voice booms.

Samuel reaches for him, smiling.

"Lee, we better start heading home, it'll get windy. Harsh weather for Samy," he says.

I nodd, following my husband into my parents' home.

* * *

Well,I'm very exited for writing the letters... ThankYou For Readingg(:


	3. Over My Choices

"Leah! Leah!"Jacob yelled, running in the front door.

"What?" I hissed, shushing him with my finger.

Samuel had just fallen asleep.

"It-it-it's, th-th-the Ger-erman-s-s," he breathed out.

"What about them?" I demanded.

Just yesterday Samuel had turned one, it was hard to believe he was growing up.

"Th-they at-t-t-acked us," he said, sitting down.

"What!" I mouthed.

He drank some water, calming down.

"Yeah, Lee. On Samy's birthday, Russia declared war against them," he said.

"I-I thought we had some type of peace between us," I demanded.

"W-we did," he said, biting his lower lip.

"I can't believe this," I said, sitting down.

He put his fists on the table, looking away.

"I was working, Dean told us they'll start recruting soldiers soon, I'm scared they'll cross my name, Lee. I don't wanna go to war," he said, looking towards Samuel's room.

"Jacob," I said, getting up.

I walked over to him, kneeing on the floor.

I cupped his face.

"I won't be like that," I whispered to him, kissing him softly.

He humphed, shaking his head.

"I-I! I can't belive this! I mean! This-this means that Paul might get-," he started, I put a hand over his mouth.

"Hey, shh. Jacob it's okay."

"For now."

I nodded.

Jacob went back to work after a little while, Emily came over soon after.

We sat at the table drinking coffee, it was quiet except for Samuel clapping in my lap.

"It-it! I don't understand, I mean war! Sam and China," Emily said, folding her arms across her chest.

I nodded, resting my head in Samuel's thick black hair.

"I understand, I mean I don't know what I'm going to do if Jacob goes to war," I said.

"Stupid Germans!"

"I don't blame the Germans, I blame Adolf Hitler," I shrugged.

"Lee," he whined, touching his forehead to mine.

The next week the unexpected arrived.

Jacob and Paul were recruted.

Jacob was to be sent to bootcamp after just a few days after recieving his letter.

Paul had to wait a few months.

The night before Jacob left, we slept as a family in the same bed.

Little Samuel in the middle.

Jacob didn't say anything, he just held my hand.

"Jake, you know it'll be okay," I whispered.

"Really?" He snorted.

"We have to hope, our army is big," I said, playing with his fingers.

"Da," Samuel said, climbing on Jacob's chest.

"Hey, buddy," he said, running his hand through Sam's hair.

He played with Jacob's shirt, trying to grab a loose button.

"I'm gonna miss you, Lee," Jacob said, his hand going from my hand to my face.

"Me too, Jacob," I said, looking at him.

"A year isn't long," he tried to say.

"Maybe it won't be, maybe," I said.

He looked at the wall, biting his lower lip.

"Show me you love me," I demanded, making him face me.

"I do," he said, putting my body under his.

"I'm gonna miss you," I cried.

"Don't cry now," he smiled weakly, kissing me softly.

The morning arrived, it was a rather sunny day.

He had his things packed, he was ready to go.

We ate breakfast as normal as possible.

"Dadda," Samuel cooed, reaching up from the floor, he was crawling on.

"Hey, buddy," Jacob smiled, scooping him up with one arm.

"Who knows, maybe training won't be that hard," Jacob joked.

"Ha,ha," I mocked.

"Just trying to cheer up the mood, Lee," he said, sitting down.

"Yeah, I see that," I said.

I sat down, facing Jacob and Samuel.

"It's gonna be a long time, who knows I might even see Sam," he said.

"Maybe you just might," I said.

The moment really did come. The moment he carried his things towards the door.

He kissed Samuel goodbye, putting him in his crib.

I heard his footsteps in our room, heading towards the living room.

I stood by the door, waiting.

I saw him exit the door, looking at me.

He raised an eyebrow, shaking his head lightly.

It was so surreal.

I felt my eyes overflowing again.

This time for real.

He came up to me, giving me a tight hug.

He didn't say anything.

He didn't have to.

His actions said it all.

He placed his hands on each side of my face, looking me in the eyes.

"I will come back, Leah," he promised.

One last kiss.

Light.

Full of love.

Full of promise.

I heard the car outside.

It was time.

Time for him to go.

To fight for our country.

Jacob chuckled.

"Better to fight proud, then fight with nothing," he joked.

"Bye, Jacob," I cried.

He wiped my cheeks with his thumbs.

"Bye, Leah. I love you."

"I love you, too."

"I love you more."

He let my face go, getting his things.

He opened the door.

I filled my cheeks with air.

"I love you."

He closed the door behind him.

I watched the car pull away.

I watched it until I could no longer see it.

I walked into our room, which now seemed empty.

I looked at Samuel in his crib.

To much.

To much.

I let the tears fall.

I let the feeling of fear consume me.

The first couple of months were the hardest.

Samuel cried often.

He missed Jacob.

Heck, I missed Jacob.

Jacob's parents would come and visit, offering Samuel and I a home until Jacob came back.

If he came back.

Just so we wouldn't be alone.

My parents were the same.

They often offered.

Told me Seth around Samuel would a good thing.

I denied.

We were fine.

I got the first letter a few weeks after the last denied offer.

_Dear Leah,_

_Life here isn't that hard. Well it isn't easy, but you get what I mean right? Food is okay, so is the rooming here. I met a guy here, his name is Joseph, he's from around where we live. He says his wife, Sarahbel is going through what your going through. You guys might be good friends. They got a kid around Samuel's age, says her name is Cara. They told me I might get sent out pretty soon, they say I've gotten well in shape. Paul's gonna be sent out here soon. Hope he can take it._

_Tell me, Lee. How are you? Do you look different? Still sexy? Just kidding. How's Sammy? I really miss him, I never thought I'd miss getting up in the middle of the night. Can he walk? Does he still remember me? How are your parents? Seth still workin'? _

_I miss you. I miss how you snore, just kidding. But I do. It's hard not seeing your wife in such a long time. I hope this war ends soon, I just really miss you. Tell my parents I miss them, tell Sammy not to forget me. _

_Love Jake._

I cried again. Missing him. Knowing this thing was just barely starting. Just barely.

I sat on the bed with Samuel, staring at a blank piece of paper.

"What should we write to daddy?" I asked my son.

"Bah, bah. Nuuu! Mumma," he said, pouting.

"Sure," I said.

I put the paper down, scooping up Samuel.

"It's time for bed," I told him.

He started moving around.

"No, none of that. C'mon, Sammy. Tomorrow morning, Grandpa Harry is coming to pick us up," I smiled at him.

He cupped my face with his little hands, squeezing my cheeks.

After a few minutes, he fell asleep.

I placed him beside me.

I re-read Jacob's letter, it had been mailed a few weeks ago. So this wasn't anything really recent.

_Hi Jake._

_I miss you here too. Things aren't the same anymore._

_Samuel's fine. Yeah, he walks. He can say momma, dog, no, and milk. That's about it. I miss you alot. I miss yelling at you and Samuel to be quiet. Samuel hasn't forgot about you, he asks for you sometimes. I miss you, I miss fighting. I miss it all._

_I hope things over there are going good. My parents are doing good, Seth is getting older, so he can help more. Things around here aren't the same without you. Our little house seems bigger now. Lonely. If it wasn't for Samuel, I'd probably be going crazy by now. Your parents and my parents have been asking me alot to move closer to them. I've denied over and over again, but right now. I think that it's a good idea, Samuel gets really lonely here. _

_Right back to me soon, came back to me soon. I love you, Jacob. _

There.

That was pretty much all I wanted to say.

I sent it out the next day when my dad came to pick Sameul and I up.

Jacob wouldn't get it right away, but eventualy he would.

He'd come back one day.

Soon.


End file.
